It’s Labor Day weekend in the states so this week I decided to phone in my article by ranking almost every dual land cycle. I say almost because I may have missed some. I also included a bunch of reprints as well and brought the total to an even 35. The list is in order from 1 – 35 instead of counting down. Why? Because you all know that #1 is the original dual lands and #2 is the Ravnica dual lands. So we can get those out of the way early and then you can find out which sets had absolutely terrible dual land options. Here we go!

1 – 10: The Best Dual Lands Ever

1. The Original Dual Lands

I considered trolling you all with the Vintage Master’s image but decided none of you deserved it.

2. Ravnica Shocks the World

You have no idea how real the hype was when this card was spoiled.

3. Onslaught Makes Fetch Happen

I think I literally tore apart all my Mirage fetches when these were printed.

4. Ice Age Brings the Pain

God bless whomever hired the Foglio’s to do art for Magic

5. Scars of Mirrodin’s Turn Three Lands

There was some skepticism whether these would be good which was quickly laid to rest.

6. Apocalypse Finishes the Pain Land Cycle

I opened this at the first prerelease I ever played in. #oldschool

7. Mirage Tries to Make Fetch Happen

Again, very tempting to go with Vintage Masters, but it’s a holiday so I’ll be nice.

8. Zendikar Finishes the Fetch Land Cycle

Seriously, how have these never been reprinted? I’m hoping for “From the Vault: Three Copies of Each Zendikar Fetch for $300” coming out next fall.

9. Ravnica Block’s Karoo Lands

Playing with these for the first time was like learning just how powerful the Death Star’s main cannon really was.

10. Shadowmoor’s Filter Lands

These are great except when your opening hand has three of them and no other lands.

11 – 20: Budget and Casual Dual Lands

11. Worldwake’s Creature Lands

This is the highest ranked set of dual lands that always comes into play tapped, and for a good reason, they kick a ton of ass.

12. Battle for Zendikar’s Tango Lands

Yes these were just previewed and yes they’re this high on the list. Do you see the words “Swamp Mountain” above?

13. Return to Ravnica’s Shocking Return

Everyone knew these were coming back, but it was still very exciting to see them in action again.

14. Theros Block’s Scry Lands

The next highest set that comes into play tapped is at #23. Scry 1 turns out to be well worth the cost of board development.

15. Khans of Tarkir Modernizes the Onslaught Fetches

These were supposed to bring down the price of Zendikar fetches by becoming Modern legal. YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BRING BALANCE TO THE FORCE!

16. Future Sight’s Futuristic Dual Lands

I really wish that the new Battle for Zendikar Expeditions used this frame instead of the crappy “full-art” frame they’re going to be using.

17. Lorwyn’s Tribal Dual Lands

First pick in tribal cube. Last pick everywhere else.

18. Magic 2015 and Origins Reprint the Pain Lands

This cycle seems so fundamental that it’s surprising it gets reprinted so infrequently.

19. The Magic 2010 – 2014 Dual Lands

Watching the value of these plummet as they were printed in five straight core sets was hilarious.

20. Innistrad Completes the Magic 2010 Cycle

I was genuinely surprised when these never made it to the core set. I hope one day the entire 10-card cycle will get reprinted with full-art frames (said no one ever)

21 – 30: Keep these at the Kitchen Table

21. Time Spiral’s Storage Lands

Also how have these never been reprinted in a supplemental product like Commander? Come on Wizards.

22. Battle for Zendikar’s Expeditions

Oh great. They took the #2, #3, #8, and #12 entries on this list and turned them into a gimmick. Thanks Obama.

23. Coldsnap’s Snow Lands

These sucked, but they add snow mana for those of you who insist on playing cards like Mouth of Ronom in your EDH deck.

24. Ninth and Tenth Edition’s Pain Land Set

Fun Fact: All 9th edition cards are black-bordered in Gatherer but the set was only black-bordered in the Russian printing. Fun Fact 2: 9th edition was the first time the entire 10-card pain-land cycle was printed in one set.

25. Khans of Tarkir Finishes the Refuge Cycle

Gaining one life is not terrible but it’s not a vast improvement over nothing. Vast enough to get the 25th spot on our list by virtue of being a complete 10-card cycle.

26. Return to Ravnica’s Guildgates

Apparently producing snow mana and gaining 1 life are better than being part of some terrible combo deck.

27. Fifth, Sixth, and Seventh Edition’s Ice Age Reprints

Fifth Edition was such a downer and reprinting the Ice Age lands with bad art and white borders was not helping.

28. Zendikar Refuge Lands

If Khans of Tarkir hadn’t finished the cycle these likely would have been higher on the list. But it did, and these are rubbish.

29. Krosan Verge and Riftstone Portal

The theme of Odyssey block was “let’s mess with the color-pie balance” and these two lands were part of that failed experiment.

30. Odyssey’s Filter Lands

It would take Wizards almost ten years to fix this mistake in Shadowmoor block.

31 – 35: The Worst Dual Lands Ever

31. Tempest’s Pain Lands and Delayed-Use Dual Lands

Haha I finally made you look at cards from Vintage Masters! After the Mirage Fetch Lands I bet you were thinking “are there any other VMA lands?” Well here they are, sucker!

As if one shitty dual land cycle wasn’t enough, Tempest had two! Wizards was thinking “these pain lands are not bad enough, let’s see how crappy we can make them!”

32. Torment Taints Your Lands

Exhibit B in Odyssey block’s failed experiment in color-pie unbalancing

33. The Invasion Lands

I suppose this is technically better than the Tempest comes-into-play-tapped pain lands, but in reality these were just a huge slap in the face. No drawback. No bonus. Just 100% suck.

34. Eighth Edition Reprints the Invasion Lands

And then they got reprinted. Why?

35. Champions of Kamigawa Reprints the Invasion Lands

Absolutely nothing is worse than taking one of Tempest’s god-awful dual land cycles and giving it a functional reprint.

Wallpaper of the Week

A++ use of scale birds. What you don’t know is that pictured near each of those scale birds is a flock of smaller scale birds. Those are actually scale Elder White-Dragons. Ulamog is big. That’s what I’m trying to get at.

Grade: A

What We Learned is a weekly feature here at Hipsters of the Coast written by former amateur Magic Player Rich Stein, who came really close to making day two of a Grand Prix on several occasions. Each week we will take a look at the past seven days of major events, big news items, and community happenings so that you can keep up-to-date on all the latest and greatest Magic: the Gathering community news.

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